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Carolyn Jackie is back to share some amazing wisdom about how to find grace as a stay at home mom. I found her advice helpful as a work at home mom too!
We’ve all heard the saying, ‘happy mom, happy baby’. But how often does that feel like a ‘moody, exhausted and drained mom, trying to keep a happy baby’? Though it may feel impossible, these habits of a happy stay at home mom will help you to find joy in what may feel like a tiring and mundane lifestyle!
Whether you are new to staying at home with your children, or you have been doing this for a while and have simply run out of steam, this article is for you!
These simple habits will help you to change your mindset and help you to actually enjoy each day you spend at home with your children. You’ll be happier, and in turn, so will everyone around you – win-win!
Research has actually shown that a mother’s mood can directly affect her child’s mood. Even worse, it can also increase the likelihood of problems, such as hyperactivity, aggressiveness, and anxiety in children!
This is no surprise either, as a stay at home mom, you’re the one person that your little one sees ALL THE TIME! We want them to see us cheerful, laughing and happy, not drained, moody, and dragging our feet!
Now I’ve probably just left you feeling 100 times worse. But it’s okay! Keep reading and I’ll help you to combat this with my top 9 habits of a happy stay at home mom!
She cuts herself some slack
There may be days where you’re still unready, still chilling in your pajamas at 12 pm, but that’s okay!
Your home may not be tidy 100% of the time, because guess what, people actually live in it! Especially if you have speedy little kiddos running around, it’s bound to get messy at some points in the day.
You’ll simply exhaust yourself if you’re trying to keep it looking like a perfectly tidy showroom 24/7 – you need to cut yourself some slack!
In so many aspects of our role, we can be so hard on ourselves. We put unnecessary pressure on ourselves to have things perfect all the time and we blame ourselves when it is not.
You’re doing the best job you can mom! That is something to commend you for! Happy stay at home moms understand that they can’t be on top of everything all the time, and that is okay!
Related read: Finding Balance as a New Mom
She strives for contentment
Happy stay at home moms understand that the grass isn’t always greener on the other side. They love and appreciate their kids and their home, in spite of the countless flaws!
You may not be a millionaire, and you may not be able to take your kids on numerous holidays each year. But you can learn to love the life you are living now, without constantly searching for something you don’t have.
A friend of mine told me that she used to live in a tiny one-bedroom apartment with her 3 children. She said it was cramped, uncomfortable, and no one could even dream of having any sort of personal space.
But she and her husband made the decision to describe it as their ‘Palace’, to learn to love it and to avoid complaining about the lack of space.
Over the years her children began to also describe their petite home as their ‘Palace’. Each day was much happier because they found ways to be content with their tiny space and years later, those children still think of it as a happy memory!
Strive to be content in every aspect of your life and you’ll be shocked to see how this will brighten up each day!
Check out this post to help you as you do this: Finding Contentment in Motherhood.
She sets her own goals
Have you ever set yourself a goal, then sat back and asked yourself why you are even doing it?
Are you setting this goal because you really want to achieve this, or are you setting it because everyone else is aiming for it? Or even more common – are you setting this goal because it will be cool to tell everyone that you have achieved it?
Setting your goals according to what everyone else is doing will leave you running in a never-ending rat-race. Even worse, not hitting those goals will leave you feeling down about yourself – all because you’re comparing yourself to everyone else!
A happy stay at home mom sets her own achievable goals, no matter how small or insignificant it may seem to everyone else.
She celebrates every little achievement
For a long time, this was me when I could finally get up early in the morning!
To some, that’s an easy habit that they have done for years. But for me, it was hard and I worked at it for months.
Your small achievement can be as simple as you doing all 3 things on your to-do list for the day. It can even be as simple as your little one remembering to use their potty again.
Learn to find joy in every little achievement and you’ll feel proud and accomplished every day!
Happy stay at home moms understand that they don’t always have to wait for a huge event to have something to feel proud of. Trust me, you’re doing something great each day!
She tries to be ‘productive’ rather than ‘busy’
I’ve noticed that now more than ever, we are bombarded with messages about ‘productivity’ and making the most of our time. But are we ACTUALLY doing it right?
I can’t be the only one who was starting my day with ridiculously long to-do lists that were IMPOSSIBLE to complete in 24 hours. Did I really need to feel tired and flustered, just so I could tell myself that I had a productive day? Absolutely not!
By the time the evening starts, my kids had hardly had any time with me because I had been rushing around all day. Even worse, I felt down and demotivated by the millions of items on my list that I didn’t manage to complete.
Happy stay at home moms make the most of their time by planning for important, meaningful tasks and making sure that they have time left for a more important task: rest.
If you’re looking for easy, yet effective tips for being a much more productive mom, have a look here!
Related read: How to Design a Stay at Home Mom Schedule for Sanity
She practices self-care
Now, this doesn’t just mean running yourself a bath and slapping on a face mask.
Although that is nice and I definitely do enjoy it!
Self-care is a constant, all-day habit of a happy stay at home mom. This can include slowly enjoying your favorite hot drink, lighting a sweet-smelling candle, or even taking your vitamins!
Whatever makes you feel good!
Remembering to do things that make you smile all throughout the day will make you feel happier within yourself. Even better, your family will get to see a happier, more smiley mom! Yet another win-win!
Related read: 61 Self-Care Ideas for Moms Who Don’t Have a Lot of Time
She understands gratitude
No matter how small or insignificant it may seem, there’s always a reason to be grateful!
I’m grateful that I have the opportunity to stay home with my son, that I have my cozy home, and that today is yet another day that I can spend with my family.
I’m also grateful that I managed to get up before him today, that the weather was lovely, and that I didn’t have as much laundry to do as I did yesterday.
Do you see my point? You don’t have to have a super significant event happen before you show gratitude for it. Getting yourself used to looking for the good in everything will automatically change your outlook on life. You’ll find yourself much happier, even though your circumstances may not have changed.
In my opinion, this is the most important habit of a happy stay at home mom. It’s not just an extra thing to do each day, but it’s a whole mindset shift.
Looking at the world through grateful eyes will change your entire perspective on life!
She picks her battles
Not every broken toy, spilled juice, and toddler tantrum deserves your stress.
Of course, it’s important to correct your little ones when it is necessary. But you really don’t need to spend your whole day getting mad about every single thing that happens!
Happy stay at home moms choose wisely which battles they give their energy to. So if that means you have to learn to laugh things off – so be it!
Being a happy mom isn’t something that will simply pop up overnight. It takes the continual implementation of these habits of a happy stay at home mom!
I hope these tips have helped you! Which on helped you the most? Be sure to share them as you never know who might need to see this!