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Ready for a dose of humor? Childbirth, while undoubtedly rewarding, can also be a challenging and sometimes painful experience. Between the physical discomfort, emotional ups and downs, and the myriad decisions that must be made, it’s no surprise that many moms and dads find themselves in comically awkward situations during delivery!
From unexpected sounds to hilarious drug-induced comments, here are some of the funniest and most awkward birth moments moms share on online forum threads.
1. Very Relaxed During the Epidural
Many moms have reported embarrassing gas-related stories after getting an epidural. This is likely due to a mix of loss of sensation and relaxation.
One mom reports being rolled to her side during a contraction to get the epidural to spread correctly and promptly passed gas. She apologized, but the nurses were likely used to it.
2. Mama is Feeling Great
When a mom in labor finally gets some pain relief via epidural or pain medication, it can elicit some pretty good feelings. All women respond differently to medication; some can have a pretty hilarious response.
One mom reports that she felt great after getting some pain medication when her epidural didn’t work. She says her mother-in-law walked in right as her drugs were kicking in. So when asked how she was feeling, she responded, “I’m really f**king high right now.” This elicited a bout of laughter from her husband and his mom.
3. Passing Wind on the Nurse
Passing gas while breathing through contractions and pushing is normal, whether you have an epidural or not.
One mom reports letting out gas for a long period of time. Since she’d had an epidural, she couldn’t feel it but could hear it- and was mortified that a nurse was between her legs and situating a pillow simultaneously. All the mom could do was giggle.
4. Am I Hallucinating?
Whether from drugs or complete exhaustion, some women may feel delirious.
One mom reports that she was in labor for 5 days and hallucinated a cheerleader standing behind her doctor. This cheerleader was making her mad; the laboring mom started yelling at the cheerleader and telling her to shut up before she dropkicks her. The nurse that was holding the mom’s leg thought the mom was yelling at her, and the mom was mortified.
5. Changing Rooms While Crowning
In some hospitals, it’s common to labor in a triage room until it’s time to push and deliver the baby in a separate room. This can lead to hiccups when babies come quicker than expected.
One mom who was expecting twins needed to be moved to the OR (operating room) for delivery- just in case. To her surprise, she began pushing the triage room and had to be wheeled down the hall when a baby was already coming out.
6. I Didn’t Even Poop!
Defecating during labor is a common fear. Yet, it’s also a pretty common occurrence when pushing with all your might, and the baby is moving around.
One mom remembers that when she finally has her baby on her chest, she proudly commented that she didn’t even go number 2 on herself. To her surprise, the two midwives began to giggle quietly- because she had a lot.
7. Please Get Everyone Out of the Room
After giving birth, it can be hard to control bodily functions while the body finally gets to rest.
One mom proudly made it through labor without any embarrassing moments, only to end up with a bad case of diarrhea. She says 8 adults were in her room when she noticed diarrhea everywhere. She couldn’t move because of her recent epidural, so she covered herself with a sheet and asked her husband to quickly remove everyone from the room before the smell got too bad.
8. Is She High?
Some moms say pretty hilarious things when drugged up for pain relief.
One mom was on diamorphine and telling everyone in the delivery room that the bowl of pasta she would see looked amazing (there was no bowl of pasta). She went on to tell her nurses about the sand she sometimes found in her pockets even though she hadn’t been to the beach.
9. Is He Supposed to Look Like That?
Babies tend to look a bit squished and shocked when they are suddenly removed from the womb and brought into “real” life.
One mom says that during her c-section, her husband began happily crying when the baby came. All she could manage to say was, “he’s all gray!” making the anesthesiologist laugh.
10. Is that a Placenta?
When the baby finally comes, there’s still a little more work to be done to push out the placenta. But it is usually pretty easy compared to a baby! Some moms are intrigued by it and want to see it, and others don’t want to have anything to do with it.
One mom was convinced it looked like a sausage and commented, “the sausages are just shooting out,” when she delivered the placenta. This made her mom laugh hysterically at her.
11. Are Those My Legs?
One mom recalls, “When my epidural got really settled in, my legs felt like huge hams. The nurse laid me on my sides so the medicine could even out on both sides with my legs stacked, knee to knee. My legs kept sliding off the bed and it was the funniest thing because I could see it but not feel it. “Oh, there goes my leg again.” Then the doctor came when it was time to push and they threw my legs onto the stirrups, with loud thunks. I was laughing so hard because it just felt so strange and I laughed the whole time pushing so I had a baby out in 3 pushes because I kept thinking about that image of my legs being thrown onto the plastic.”
12. Massage, Please
One mom was desperate for some relief from her leg pain. So she had her husband bring her “personal massager.”
“Mind you, this is no shy little egg vibr****. No, this is a Doxy, the semi-truck of vibr****s; it rumbles like a Harley and could be used to club baby seals. It also actually does function pretty well as a neck/back massager, among its more clandestine uses. So Husband and my mom were taking turns using it on my legs to try to get the pain down.” Her husband later told her it was the strangest visual he’s ever seen.
13. Cursing Like a Sailor
It’s not uncommon for moms to cuss during labor. One mom recalls, “Apparently I said some strange things while in labour. One mom recalls, “One midwife said she was sure I would name the baby ‘little f****r’ as I kept screaming, “get this little f****r out of me” I also shouted at my boyfriend “keep your demon d**k away from me!” Gas and air does strange things to me lol.”
14. This Baby is Killing Me!
One mom unexpectedly couldn’t get an epidural. Here’s her story: “I was terrified and I didn’t think I could do it [birth a baby]. Between contractions and pushing I kept saying, “I can’t do it. He’s (the baby) trying to kill me!” My mom kept telling me he’s not trying to kill me, he just wants to come out and meet me. When they put him on my chest my mom said, “See. He wasn’t trying to kill you.” And I whispered, “He failed.” My husband loves telling that part of the story, he thinks it’s hilarious.”
15. Husband’s Anxiety
“My water broke at exactly 38 weeks, at 4am. I woke my husband up, and as soon as I said the words, “my water broke”, he shot out of bed like a bullet. I’ve never seen him move so fast, and I still chuckle when I think about the look on his face.” This sounds like all of the Hollywood birth shots where the husbands go crazy while the mom remains calm.
16. Undies Be Gone
One woman reports, “40 +7 days and no dilating or anything, so the OBGYN sent me to the hospital for an induction to see if it would speed anything up. checked in, undressed, got in the gown, laid down to have the OBGYB check the situation out and start the first round of cervadil.
OBGYN started laughing and said .. yeah, you’re going to need to take your underwear off. DUH!
I ended up leaving the hospital the next morning with a failed induction, came back a few days later to induce again and get the baby out! i remembered to take off my underwear the 2nd time around.
17. Dad Needs an Anatomy Review
“My water broke at 36 weeks. My husband was crazy stressed the entire time I was in labor. We didn’t find out the baby’s sex ahead of time and the staff all knew this. 18 hours after my water breaks, out comes the baby. Doctor says, “Okay, Dad, is it a boy or a girl?” My stressed and distracted husband answers, “Uhhh….boy?” Doctor says, “No! It’s a girl!” About a month later I had to ask him if that had really happened. Yup. It did.”
18. OMG, It’s a Baby!
“Probably fairly common, but giving birth to my first, induction without any pain relief so it was intense and fast and a wee bit overwhelming. They handed me my son to do skin to skin time as soon as he came out, and my first words to him – “Oh my God, it’s a baby!?!”
Husband cracked up laughing right there. He was like, what did you expect? Lol.”
19. Baby Butts
A mom shares her insight when she finally got to hold her new baby: “when they placed my son on my chest, I was patting his little butt and said it was like slapping raw chicken lol.”
20. Hair Jokes
Another mom shares a funny story: “My midwife, my husband and I had an ongoing joke throughout my pregnancy about pub** [body hair], and how there was no way I was going to be removing them just to go to the pool – I said who cares, I love them and they can just float like seaweed. I tried to have a home birth, things didn’t work out and I ended up in the hospital having an emergency c section… needless to say, things had been tense until I got the epidural. After that they brought out this little electric shaver thing and started bringing it towards my beloved pubic hair!
“Noooooooooo,” I cried, making the doctors and nurses jump, thinking that the epidural hadn’t worked. “Not my PUB**!”” Of course, this made the whole team in the room laugh.
21. Counting Games for the Hemorrhoids
Another mom writes, “I delivered my first baby after pushing for several hours. The doctor was stitching me up and my sister was watching him since she’s into that kind of stuff. As he’s down there, the doctor starts pointing out the hemorrhoids and counting them out loud for her, “1, 2, 3…” He sounded like the Tootsie Roll pop bird.” A funny story but also an uncomfortable reality for pregnant and new moms.
22. Asleep on the Job
“My husband is a stress sleeper. When I started getting through it, the nurse went to get my husband saying ” Okay dad I think we need you.” Pan over to my husband and he’s passed out. She then panned back to me ” Never mind just us then.” And it was such a comedic moment.” Shares another mom.
23. I’m Not Ready!
“My son was born about 2 days into my mat leave – he was at term but earlier than my due date – so I had all these plans of things to do and, specifically, food to batch cook for the freezer… So during labour and a particularly strong contraction I shouted out ‘I’ve not even made the pies yet!!’ My midwife just looked and me like ‘I think we’ve got bigger problems.’” Shares a mom.
24. You Get a Cookie
“This didn’t seem ridiculous at all in the moment but looking back I feel like a fool. When my contractions became so strong that I couldn’t easily ignore them and had to focus on breathing through them, my husband would feed me a cookie after each one. I would announce a contraction, breathe through it, and then open my mouth and receive a gingerbread cookie. It must have looked ridiculous to the midwife but it worked for me perfectly. I cringe even thinking about it now. “
This had other ladies laughing and imagining this woman as a dog getting a treat for her good behavior.
25. You Can Eat Soon
One mom was laughing at her husband’s comments, “my husband encouraging me to push “come on honey, you will soon have your smoked salmon sandwich”. gave me a fit of laughter.”
26. Loud Snores
A mom share’s a husband’s desperate attempt to deal with his wive’s pregnancy snoring. “I snored like a chainsaw while pregnant and would constantly wake myself up. After finally getting the epidural, I fell asleep hard.
A little bit later, I briefly woke up to my husband quietly placing a Breathe Right strip over my nose.” Lol.
27. Fire Alarm Bells
Talk about bad luck. One mom shares, “As I was in the middle of giving birth, the hospital fire alarm suddenly went off. Nurses rushed in, telling us it was a false alarm and that we were safe to continue. In the midst of it all, I couldn’t help but think that my baby’s entrance into the world was so epic that even the alarms had to chime in for applause!” At least she saw the positive side!
28. That’s a Lot of Pee
When laboring at the hospital, a mom shares that she felt a sudden gush of water, convinced it was her water finally breaking. After further inspection, the nurse quietly informed her that she had only peed herself. With all that extra pressure on the bladder during contractions (and general pregnancy), this is a common story that can be laughed away later when the moms isn’t in the moment.
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