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Embracing toddlerhood often entails a messy bun, all-day pajamas, discovering a half-eaten apple nestled in your blankets, and the occasional food in your hair. It’s a delightful blend of chaos, fun, and comedy. In this phase, expect to repeat yourself to the point of hoarseness and navigate the perilous realm of stepping on scattered Legos. Yet, amid the challenges, there’s the promise of the warmest hugs and the most endearing giggles.
If these situations sound familiar, grab a seat in the toddler moms’ support group.
1. Your Meals Are Explainable
A toddler Mom’s food consists of what the baby didn’t finish eating because they are frugal and economic like that.
You understand if you see a toddler Mom eating left-over pureed broccoli with a side of boiled baby carrots.
2. Showering In Micro-Seconds
When [or if] a toddler Mom gets time to shower, it’s not a luxurious lathering and singing in the shower.
She knows the safest way to shower is by taking the shortest time possible in the water, in and out, before the little one wakes up and collapses the galaxy.
3. Sleep Is A Distant Memory
Sleep? What’s that? A toddler mom may not even remember the last time they slept for three continuous hours, and we’re being very generous.
That’s why a mom with a toddler has eyebags for permanent makeup.
4. A Sea Of Toys In The Living Room
Cleaning up a living room when you have a toddler is like mopping up the ocean; it’s an activity in futility.
Walk into any home with a toddler, and you’ll most likely be welcomed by a carpet of Lego/duplo. Tread carefully.
5. Baby-proofed Electronics and Drawers
Babies are fast and sneaky, five seconds away from them, and they lock themselves in the washing machine.
You will know a home with a toddler by the sight of latches on the fridge and locks on drawers. Safety first.
6. Strange-Sounding Phone Calls
A phone call with a toddler’s Mom is interrupted by many background instructions and screams for the baby to step away from the hot stove.
You have to be very understanding when calling a Mom with a toddler; half the conversation is usually not with you but with the little human spinning in circles behind her.
7. Messaging About Bowel Movements—A Lot
A baby’s bowel movements are a great mystery to many moms—they worry about poop color, poop timing, poop consistency—and everything poop related.
Many moms will text their moms with all manner of poop questions and send their partners minute-by-minute poop updates. Totally normal!
8. Baby Things In Your Handbag
A toddler mom’s handbag has the weirdest things inside, and very few of them are adult-related.
Ask any mom with a baby to empty their bags, and you will find crayons, wet wipes, pacifiers, and possibly a feeding bottle. Most of the time, we don’t even know how those things got there.
9. Stains Everywhere
There’s a stain on your couch, a stain on the carpet, a stain on your bedsheets, and one unexplainable stain on your shirt.
It’s like babies are walking printers, leaving a stain of something everywhere they go. Thoughts and prayers for your bright couches.
10. You’re Fueled By Coffee
From the moment a mom wakes up, she’s hit by a myriad of questions and requests and gibberish details about the baby’s dreams.
The only way some toddler Moms survive is by drowning themselves in coffee.
11. Adult Conversations Change
Your conversations with other adults often revolve around potty training, nap schedules, and the latest parenting hacks.
Welcome to Mommyhood.
12. Instant Entertainer
You didn’t know you could create a career in entertainment until you had babies.
Now, you’ve had to perform impromptu puppet shows or magic tricks to distract and entertain your little one.
13. Assembly Expert
Before, you couldn’t tell a nail from a screw. Now, you’ve become an expert at assembling and disassembling strollers, car seats, and other baby gear without needing the instruction manual.
14. Snack Hiding
Toddlers will sleep through a tornado and a nuclear bomb and be alerted awake by the sound of Mom unwrapping her favorite snack.
You know you’re the cliche Mom when you now hide your favorite snacks because your toddler suddenly becomes an expert at finding and devouring them.
15. Nursery Rhymes Are Your Favorite Music
You considered yourself classy and listened to upbeat music. Now, your phone is full of Cocomelon and a never-ending playlist of nursery rhymes.
This music is your saving grace during long trips and meal times.
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