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Regardless of their relationship status—be it single, married, or divorced—men often contend with a continuous stream of messages from diverse sources, occasionally perceived as persistent reminders. These messages have the potential to evoke intermittent feelings of frustration, a sense of being misunderstood, and an overarching state of weariness.
Here are some of the top things men are sick of hearing, pulled from a thread full of men wanting to be seen and heard for once.
1. Are You the Dad or Babysitter?
Dads are tired of the assumption that they are incapable of raising their own children. Society often calls daddy time “babysitting”- when they’re really just parenting their children like their mom would. This untrue ideal makes it hard to put old-school gender roles to rest.
Unfortunately, some moms perpetuate this assumption by complaining about their “useless” husbands who don’t know how to care for their kids. In reality, men and women can equally be great to terrible parents- no need to assume.
2. Can You Fix It?
One writer is sick of hearing about everything that sounds “funny.” From the car to the furnace, he iterates that not all men are handy or are DIY inclined. This is just another stereotype.
Plus, the men that are handy admit that they’d prefer a more direct request for help rather than complaining about things around the house that are broken or squeaking.
3. Making All the Stereotypical Assumptions
Real men _____. vs Read men don’t ______.
How many men (and women) have been subject to assumptions that simply aren’t true? Thankfully, old-school ideas like “real men don’t cry” are losing steam in modern society.
4. Why Are You Crying?
One man shares his frustrations around the narrative that supports men sharing their feelings. He loves the encouragement to open up but says he faces pushback or ridicule whenever he tries to do this.
Other men agreed and wondered how they were supposed to open up when they still fear being judged.
5. No One Wants to Work
Men are meant to bring home the bacon, right? Several men share their frustrations with trying to find a suitable job when they’re constantly ghosted by companies supposedly “hiring” or being offered a wage that wouldn’t even cover their bills. Thus, when they hear someone complain that “no one wants to work”, they find it offensive when they’d love to work but can’t find the right fit.
6. Don’t Be Such a Pessimist
Men who haven’t found a partner are often told to stay “optimistic” or “just be yourself.” These men find it exhausting and don’t want to be a part of the growing trend that many call “toxic positivity”- where talking about any real issues is looked down upon.
Most writers agreed that focusing on being their best selves (whatever that might look like for them) and not holding onto any expectations is best for living life to the fullest- partner or not.
7. Downplaying Real Issues Men Face
Many men expressed frustration over feeling invalidated anytime they try to discuss any man-related issues. They felt that the women in their lives are always trying to “one-up” them or explain that they have it easier than women.
One writer said, sorry, I was born with the wrong genitalia, but I still have a right to express my opinions and complain occasionally. We all have different struggles and perspectives that deserve validation.
8. Accused of Mansplaining
One man complains that every time he tries to explain something, he gets accused of “Mansplaining.” Mansplaining is technically defined as explaining something to a woman in a condescending tone- but most men get frustrated when they try to offer helpful info and get this designation. Should they offer help or not?
9. Daddy, Can I Have….?
One dad reports feeling like a walking and talking ATM when he’s constantly asked for money by his kids and wife. Although, other users are quick to note that he should have gratitude for being able to provide for his family.
10. Do You Need Praise for Every Little Thing?
Many men report this type of phrase coming from their wife’s or girlfriends’ mouths. The original poster said he doesn’t need praise, but he’d love a thank you or acknowledgment for the actions he takes.
Overall, mutual respect and appreciation admittedly go a long way in a happy relationship. Having gratitude, even the little things, for both parties can make for a happy life!
11. All the Good Men Are Taken
For the single guys out there, either never married or divorced, they’re sick of hearing “there are no good guys around.” Some say it feels like a slap in the face when they’re standing right there, single and ready to date. When they bring this up, they often get ghosted.
12. Men Are So Terrible
One man reports, “All men [insert vitriol]. Then, after the backlash of being a terrible person, “Oh my gosh, I didn’t mean all men, obviously”, despite the fact that what they said was pretty clear.” It seems we all could be a bit more mindful of the words coming out of our mouths.
13. Your Life is SO Easy
Some men note they always hear how easy life is for males, which they find confusing. One writer points out the reason for this, “You see, the world is easy for men. You just need to understand the angle: The only men that exist is the men they see. The rich guys. The successful ones. The top 5% attractive ones. The ones with amazing cars. The socially perfect ones.
The other men go unseen. When women complain about “men” having better jobs, they do so because they literally ignore the men cleaning their sewers and fixing their cars and risking their lives so they get basic services. They literally don’t consider that the man breaking his spine in their living room trying to install the router IS a man. He’s not rich and successful and attractive, so… he doesn’t count.
The men women notice have it easy, because they only notice the ones that are extremely successful.“
14. I Don’t Want to Hear It
“Saying very quickly “I don’t want to hear it” to you when they didn’t like your honest response to the question “How was your day?”
Icing on top is when they leave the room or walk away straight afterwards.”
15. There’s Nothing to Eat
One man shares his least favorite phrase from his kids: “”There is nothing to eat at home after we spent $400 on groceries.”
16. Why Doesn’t He Come Talk to Me?
Single men are frustrated with women that always expect men to make the first move. This is especially true when the woman hasn’t made a single effort to express their interest. Are they supposed to read a woman’s mind? They agree, it’s a two-way street!
17. My Way or the Highway
Some men note that they have partners that think there is only one way to do something- dubbing their way as “wrong.” For example, one man is exasperated every time his wife tells him that the way he gets the kids ready for bed isn’t right- yet they end up asleep either way!
18. Constant Questioning
Men are sick of hearing “Are you sure you know what you’re doing?” Whether it’s related to driving, fixing, parenting, etc…. have some faith in their abilities, especially if they were asked to help!
19. Expecting to Pay for It All
The common thought, “You’re the man, you should pay” is outdated and bogus. Men are no longer expected to foot all the bills when dating and beyond.
20. Making Excuses to Bad Men
For all the good guys in the world, they are sick of the bad ones getting a free pass simply for being men. “Boys will be boys” doesn’t cut it anymore.
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