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An online forum user has shared how she attended her best friend’s baby shower without a gift. But she didn’t do it out of spite…
She had asked her friend whether she should bring a gift and was told it was not about presents but support for her and her new family. Great! So she showed up empty-handed. But then, her best friend was mad and made it clear the day after the party. Was she wrong?
No Gift Registry Was Listed
The OP shares how she sent a text message to her best friend after receiving an emailed invite to her baby shower. As there was zero mention of a gift registry, she wanted to confirm what the expectation was regarding presents. The OP’s best friend responded that she should “Just bring your support” and that it was not really about the gifts “for me.”
The Baby Shower
The OP goes on to explain that she turned up at the baby shower to see her best friend being bombarded with gifts, from diapers to bottles, outfits to books, and much more. At this stage, the OP became uncomfortable and felt embarrassed about her lack of a gift. She was the only one not to bring something. However, a couple of days prior to the event, she had given her best friend a card telling her how happy for her she was. At one point, the OP felt her friend give her a look, but this was not accompanied by any words at all.
The day after the baby shower, the OP received a text from the mom-to-be asking why she had turned up without a gift and that even something small would have sufficed. The OP responded that she had queried the gift situation and reminded her friend that it was supposed to be about presence rather than presents. The best friend retorted that her friend was ‘dense’ and then exclaimed, “You’re my best friend, but you couldn’t even do the bare minimum.” The OP states that if her friend hadn’t told her no gift was expected, she would certainly have taken one.
Other Reddit users were somewhat torn on whether the OP was in the right or not.
Some people asked the OP if she would have attended a birthday party without taking a gift, even if it was something small, especially with it being her best friend and not simply an acquaintance or work colleague.
Others questioned why the OP did not stick to the original meaning of the name ‘baby shower’ and take something to help shower the mom-to-be and baby with presents and love.
However, some users queried why the best friend could not be straight with the OP and tell her if she expected gifts. When someone is unable to be honest with a girlfriend, how strong is the actual friendship?
Finally, some Reddit users had doubts about the best friend’s text wording. When she stated that it wasn’t really about gifts for her, did that actually imply that she was expecting something for her baby instead?
What do you think? Should the OP have known to bring a gift regardless?